Twas the night before Christmas and the nurse is at Work

Twas the night before Christmas and the nurse is at work

Many a creature is stirring, including a jerk.

All the IV’s are hung by their poles with care

In hopes that 7am would soon be there.

The patients are snuggled all safe in their beds

While drug induced dreams dance in their heads.

My fellow nurses and I who are no longer in caps

Are Just sitting down at the station to rap

When out of room seven arose such a clatter

I sprang from my seat to see what was the matter

Away to the bedside I flew in a flash

Where I grabbed the puke bucket from the cabinet stash

The light I turned on, in order to know

Exactly what the bucket contained and would show

When what to my wondering eyes should appear

But a disgusting recycled bucket of beer

Lifting my leg to hit the call bell with a kick

My fellow nurse came to assist quick as a lick

We changed him and flushed the bucket of shame

And he whistled and shouted “All hale the dames”

“They are the queens of the ER~…maybe one is a Vixen”

“Lets order some pizza! and we can call it a Mix in”

“We’ll sit on floor or lean on the wall”

“or maybe Ill just lie down in the hall”

We guided the poet who was on such a high

Back to his bed so sleep could apply

Within 5 seconds he was snoring anew

His monitor showing vitals not to warrant Code Blue

And then in a twinkling we heard something aloof

It was only the tech Ben, always being a goof.

As I let out a laugh and was turning around

He hit me with a spit ball and it fell to the ground

The patient in room seven was again up and on one foot

And this time his gown was all wet and stained with “soot”

A bundle of sheets flung over his back

He looked like street walker complete with a sack

His eyes how they twinkled, his mood was so merry

His cheeks were like roses, and his nose like a cherry

His droll little mouth was drawn up in a bow

And the beard on his chin was no longer white as snow

The spittle of puke held tight to his teeth

And the bed pan he held on his head like a wreath

He had a thin face but a big round belly

That now shook with a laugh like a bowl full of jelly

He was nothing like a plump jolly old elf

And we laughed when we saw him in spites of ourselves

A wink of eye and twist of his head

He turned around, showed us his butt…and went back to bed

He spoke not a word but flashed us a smirk

Even I had to say he was no longer a jerk

And putting his finger up inside his nose

Then giving a nod he declared, “this blows”

We moved back to our seats and sat down with a whistle

His room looked as if it was hit with a missle.

But all together we laughed and said, while keeping the patient in sight

Merry Christmas to all…and to all a good night.